Guitar Humour
Last update 25/9/203
We here at Guitar Advice all like to have a good laugh. So, as a result, we have begun a guitar-related page with humorous guitar quips and cartoons about the guitar and music in general. For example, check out our funny guitar jokes when you have a few moments to relax and smile.
Check out Cool Bananas, The Guitar Gods joke book.
As a matter of fact, It’s not easy to find funny guitar quotes and other guitar-related jokes and cartoony. Incidentally, we would love to see you on our Facebook group page, Head on over; we also enjoy a good joke there. To that end, if you want to share any, please email them from our contact page. In the meantime, here is a little jazz humor to begin with.
Check out our guitar jokes and funny stuff in the images below. Check back now and then; we will do our best to keep this page updated.
One-line jokes are at the bottom of this page after the images.
Guitar jokes
A few guitar jokes, yeh, we know some are corny. However, in conclusion, we hope they will make you smile.
1 – Two jazz guitarists meet in a bar, and then one says, “Yeah, man, I bought your last album; it was awesome!” to which the other replies, “Oh, so that was you!”.
2 – What’s the difference between an electric guitar player and a vacuum cleaner?
When you unplug a vacuum cleaner, it doesn’t suck anymore.
3 – What’s the difference between a Fender and a Gretsch?
The Gretsch burns longer. – The fact that there’s a Highway to Hell but only a Stairway to Heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.
5 – What’s the difference between a lead guitarist and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with a terrorist.
6 – What do you call a guitarist who breaks up with his girlfriend?
Homeless
7 – What’s the difference between a lawnmower and an Electric Guitar?
You can tune a lawnmower.
8 – How do you figure out who the guitar player is at a party?
He’ll tell you.
9 – Two guys were walking down the street. One was destitute. The other was a guitar player, too.
10 – A man asks the devil: “How much does it cost to be the greatest guitar player in the world?”
The devil says: “Give me your Soul.”
The man asks: “What can I get for a dollar?”
Devil: “Greatest bass player in the world.”
11 – Why are so many guitar players joked about one-liners?
So the rest of the band can understand them.
12 – How does a guitar player protect his Guitar from being stolen?
Store it in a bass case.
13 – What’s the range of a Gibson Les Paul?
Depends on how far you throw it.
14 – Why do guitarists prefer playing guitar to cycling?
Because with a bike, you only get two pedals.
15 – How can you tell when your guitarist is out of tune?
His hand starts moving.
16 – How long does it take to tune a 12-string guitar?
Nobody knows.
17 – Why bury guitar players 6 feet under?
Because deep down, they’re all very nice people.
18 – How do you get two guitar players to play in perfect unison?
Shoot One.
19 – How do you know someone’s a really good guitarist?
He’ll tell you!
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